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For imagination sets the goal picture which our automatic mechanism works on. We act, or fail to act, not because of will as commonly believed, but because of imagination. -Maxwell Maltz (1899-1975), a cosmetic surgeon and author who developed Psycho-Cybernetics, a self image improvement system.
As we have discussed, rationalizing away our potential successes can be absolutely deadly to our happiness and prevents us from ever becoming who we are really capable of being! But it still begs the question as to why we do this on a regular basis…why is this the norm and not the exception? After all, we do realize that this exists, so why can’t we just stop doing it, reverse course and begin to achieve our dreams…and I’m talking about really breaking through and not just doing a little bit better!
This week I was able to tap into some of the deep rooted frustrations of my coaching clients when I posed the question if anybody was really sick and tired of hearing a motivational speech about how they could get what they wanted if they only take this pill, that program, the next greatest technique! In the front row a hand flew in the air accompanied by a pained facial expression that indicated I had hit the bulls eye! But even though many people are diligent in their pursuit of knowledge, it seems that they still find themselves on a slippery slope!
Why!? It’s right there in front of us! Gurus and masters of anything and everything…why not just copy them…but we do you say…and I agree…you try with a martyr’s effort…yet you seem to miss the mark constantly! Well I think that I know why! And the good news is that it’s easy!
I do not believe in excuses. I believe in hard work as the prime solvent of life’s problems. -James Cash Penney (1875-1971), entrepreneur and businessman who founded J.C. Penney store in 1902.
One thing that I have learned as a real estate agent coach is that people will say the craziest things to rationalize why something does not get done! You know what I mean because we all do it…it started a long time ago…”the dog ate my homework!” Sound familiar? As a matter of fact we only seem to get better at it as time goes on…no really….think about it…”I can’t come to work today because a plane crashed in my back yard and I was up all night saving lives!”
But seriously, let’s stop and think about how much energy we put into rationalizing why we avoid doing so many things that really matter to us…I mean things that will determine whether we survive or thrive! Ever got caught by the boss not staying on task because you allowed some personal distraction into the day…texting…facebook…office chit chat? When you really sit back and think about it, that’s stealing! When somebody is paying you to do a job by the hour then they should have the right to expect a return on their dollar…no? Yet when you turn in a half way effort and then get passed over for a promotion do you start to rationalize that it’s because the boss doesn’t like you, doesn’t appreciate you, has a gender or racial bias?
Who are you really kidding or bluffing when you throw up a smoke screen? Rationalization is really the offensive weapon of denial. When you truly don’t want to face reality and hold yourself accountable, then it just seems easier to deflect. Yet the reality is that you’re just creating a ‘lumpy rug’ in your own temple…how long can you continue to sweep things under the rug and not confront them before they begin to cause real problems?
